Whilst chopping it up with my fellow alkie's (AA members) yesterday, it was decided that most ex-drunks very much like to get our naps on. Perhaps we have earned our snoozing credits from all our tiresome boozing. To be more specific, it takes a lot of gosh darn energy to thoroughly bungle up your life to a mere shred of recognition, so we drunks be tired and shit. Anyways, I gave myself the lofty title of "High Priestess of Daytime Slumber" as my buddie Darren is the King of Naps and I didn't want any tongues wagging about us hooking up if I was the Queen of Naps, although now that I think about it, there are alot of sleepy monikers one could adopt and I am listing some here:
The Duchess of Dozing
Prince Forty Winks
The Grand Master of Zzzzzs
Cousin Catnap and his Cozy Kip
Debbie Downtime
The Pillowface Burgler
Senor Timeout
Sir Rests-a-lot
His Majesty Snoring of Boring
Ok, ok, so I am taking artistic license on that last one, but moving right along......
So as the High Priestess of Daytime Slumber, I can't spend ALL my time attending to my sacred duties and must address other official yet tiresome activities like....making oatmeal.
I apologize for the brevity of this post, really, I just wrote it to amuse my friend Tony and, yawn, I feel a nap coming on now. Yes, it is time to worship at my bed shrine. I feel exalted already.
Aha...ye strive to be all things to the denizens of his mad realm. Ye are poetic "earned our snoozing..from all our boozing." Ye is urban "we drunks be tired and shit." Ye be intellectual. When was the last time a drunk use the word moniker or brevity in a written or spoken sentence? And, praise God, ye hast spiritual, as deftly structured in the last two sentences. One could almost overlook His Majesty Snoring of Boring. Keep me entertained (please).
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